From the steaming noodle shops of the International District to the clamor of pinball at Shorty’s, Seattle has much to offer those of us with shallow pockets, refined palates, and a tendency toward thirstiness.
Doc Maynard, Seattle’s drunkest and most interesting founder, called his scrappy logging town the “The Queen of the Northwest.” As the years passed, the shantytown grew into a city and acquired new nicknames: Queen City, Jet City, Rat City, Rain City, Seatown, The Emerald City. The profusion of monikers reflects a metropolis with many faces. We are happy to report that it also has an underbelly.
Since the days when Seattle was a rickety conflagration of whorehouses and gin joints strung across a mud flat, the denizens have cultivated a vibrant bar culture. For years, Seattle was wide open: gambling, prostitution, drugs — pretty much anything went. The Great Fire of 1889 was fueled, in part, by exploding whisky barrels in the city’s infamous Lava Beds, a neighborhood with a fine reputation for hooch and hookers. (Incidentally, the words Skid Row and Hootenanny both have their etymological roots in Seattle history.) Even now in the era of Microsoft and microfleece, a glittering seediness lurks just below the city’s polished surface. From the underwater glow of The Nitelite to the jewel-box elegance of Hazelwood, Seattle is still an excellent town for bars. Worth a stop: The 9 Lb Hammer in Georgetown, The Lava Lounge in Belltown, and Hattie’s Hat in Ballard. If you are forced, by unforeseen circumstances, to brave the nightlife of Pioneer Square, The Central is your best bet.
By Charlotte Brown
We love the dives: The Baranoff, The Nitelite, The Secret Bar. There’s nothing quite like the spectral twinkle of year-round Christmas lights and the raspy voice of an old lady bartender who’s wiser than Solomon and surlier than satan. For a dive bar that actually serves edible food, head to the legendary Five Point Cafe, which sits on the edge of Belltown. The Five Point is split into two sides: diner and bar, a convention that allows business to stay hopping 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. Slide into a dark booth on the bar side, order a Bloody Mary, and enjoy the riffraff; some of the denizens look like they haven’t stepped outside since the Five Point’s doors opened in 1929. We can see why: The kitchen serves damn good hash browns, the jukebox is excellent, and the bar is home to a couple of our favorite bartenders, including Dan, aka “the white Ice Cube.”
By Robin Leventhal
For a cozier vibe and more wholesome fare, check out The Two Bells on 4th Ave. Two Bells is a neighborhood hub with a pleasantly diverse clientele and a down-to-earth staff. The soup is commendable, as are the burgers, which are served on crusty French bread. If you love pub food as much as we do, travel north to Ballard and grab a Maritime Lager and a trio of mahi sliders ($6.75) at The Jolly Roger Tap Room. Other memorable Ballard offerings: the spaetzle ($4) (handmade German noodles) at The People’s Pub and the huge baskets of crunchy tater tots at The Tin Hat. We’re also liking the remarkably authentic barbacoa de res and puerco en salsa verde at the new (and otherwise non-descript) 418 Public House, which is a couple of blocks east of The Tin Hat on 65th street.
Do yourself a favor: belly up to the bar at the venerable Nitelite Lounge and order yourself a Rainier for old time’s sake. Much to our great sadness, Seattle’s Rainier brewery closed its doors in 1999, but it’s still the domestic favorite and you’ll see nostalgic Rainier paraphernalia in bars all over the city. Seattle’s beer history reflects current trends: although Rainier is now brewed in California by a corporate conglomerate, Seattle has a growing number of small local breweries. Our favorite Seattle beer is Maritime, which you can purchase by growler for remarkably economic prices at the brewery’s pub, the aforementioned Jolly Roger Tap Room. Maritime actually makes a good lager, which is remarkable for a microbrewery, and their IPA is good too. Our in-house panel of Seattle beer snobs also recommend: Fremont Abominable Ale and IPA, Georgetown Lucille IPA, and Schooner Exact 3-Grid IPA, which can be purchased by reusable and returnable 32-oz swing-top growler. A $5 for a 32-oz bottle, it’s a good deal for the discerning sot.
Seattle’s history as a coffee town is well known, and the city still boasts some of the world’s finest coffee shops. Victrola on Capitol Hill serves consistently excellent drip coffee (rare), the unassuming Sun Café on Ballard’s Market Street offers a perfect Mexican mocha, and Neptune in Greenwood hosts awesome nerd-friendly activities such as Firefly trivia.
Seattle is famous for its seafood. Seafood is famous for costing bank, and therefore seafood restaurants can be out of range for us underbelly dwellers. That said, Jet City
By Becky Fay
has some good deals. Ray’s, a Ballard institution, offers fine (and expensive) dining downstairs; upstairs the bar has cheaper options and a deck with a mood-altering view of the Puget Sound. Go for happy hour and order the steamed mussels or the seared ahi. Chase it down with a local beer. Cheapskates take note: every order comes with a complimentary basket of pillow-y rolls from the The Essential Baking Company. And if it’s cold on the deck, the staff will actually bring you blankets.
If this sounds too rich for you, head downtown and wander along the waterfront to an afternoon of hokey old school Seattle nostalgia. Drop a quarter in the giant sidewalk Nickelodeon, check out the shrunken heads at Ye Old Curiosity Shoppe (a Seattle institution since 1899), and quaff a satisfying bowl of chowder at Ivar’s, which is easy to spot because of the bronze sculpture of a sea captain flanked by disturbingly large sea gulls.
Seattle’s large and historic International District sprawls down Jackson Street to the
By Joe Mabel
Puget Sound. If you’re short on cash, there are few things more delightful than Seattle’s plethora of Vietnamese delis, where your last few dollars will purchase a delicious sandwich (banh mi), replete with slivered carrots, cucumbers, jalapenos, cilantro, and tangy barbecued pork. Our favorite Vietnamese delis are Kim Ngoc, Saigon Deli, and Seattle Deli. If you feel like getting a table, head up to Pho Bac, one of the city’s best Pho restaurants, where $6 will buy you a bowl of soup the size of your head.
The International District is the city’s cheapest and most interesting shopping district. Although the Japanese supermarket Uwajumia has its fans, we prefer the funkier Chinese and Vietnamese groceries that you’ll find further up the hill. Spend $15 at the Hau Hau, and you’ll walk away with a week’s worth of groceries: oyster mushrooms, bright tins of pickled vegetables, fresh local tofu, and armloads of produce.
A creaking behemoth perched above the bay, the storied Pike Place Market is filled with curio shops, local crafts, local produce, and of course the famously obnoxious fish vendors who put on a loud all-day show for gawking tourists. To escape from the crowd, get a beer at the Athenian Inn, which offers one of the best views in a city of great views. Cheapskates take note: across the street from the market, a warren of shops offers better deals: you’ll find produce stands, cheese counters, lunch counters, and bakeries that serve piping piroshkies and loaves of sweet-smelling challah.
For denizen of a city pigeon-holed as eco-friendly yuppielandia, Seattleites are surprisingly devoted to their fast food. Locally owned fast food, that is. Worshipped by drunks and cheapskates alike, Dick’s Drive-In serves legendary milkshakes, and $1.50 will buy you a greasy cheeseburger, perfect for a 2:00 am snack. Although the menu and locations (which appear to have changed little since 1954, when the business was started) are fast food to the core, Dick’s is a family-owned business that offers its employees full healthcare, childcare assistance, and the potential to earn a scholarship for college. Another local chain of note is Ezelle’s Famous Chicken. Ezelle’s dishes up fast food with down-home flavor and southern-fried flare; the fried chicken has the sweet allure of a bad habit.
Seattle is not one of the great historical pizza cities, but the last decade has brought marked improvements. Veraci’s excellent thin-crust pizzas are smothered with quality meats and cheeses and baked to crispy perfection in a wood-fired oven. At $5 their ample Caesar salad is an excellent value — they don’t skimp on the Parmesan. If you prefer your pizza lowbrow and no-nonsense, visit downtown’s Post Alley Pizza for a satisfyingly greasy slice, served piping hot on a paper plate.
We are always on the lookout for restaurants that while not cheap, are a good value. In Seattle, our two favorites of this ilk are Señor Moose and Brad’s Swingside Café. Both restaurants are quirky, unlikely, and devoted to amazing food. From the outside, Señor Moose looks like a hole-in-the-wall diner; inside the décor is homey and the food is amazing. As far as Mexican goes, entrées are not cheap, but for $12-$20 you get about two meal’s worth of food. While a moose-themed Mexican diner doesn’t exactly shout ‘gourmet,’ our resident Mexico expert claims that this restaurant is unsurpassed stateside when it comes to authentic Mexican food. Strong words, we know. Try the deliciously smoky carne asada or the camarones al mojo de ajo and try to argue.
Brad’s Swingside Café serves excellent Italian food in an atmosphere that will not intimidate a dweller of the underbelly: the décor is eclectic and the waiters don’t suffer the snotty reserve or fake cheer one sometimes finds at nicer restaurants. Instead, they act like real people, albeit particularly accommodating people. Eighteen dollars a plate is a bit steep for us, but when we’ve got extra cash and a special occasion to celebrate, we head to the Swingside for an enormous plate of bowtie pasta topped with wild boar. There is an ineffable quality to food made with love, and Brad’s food has it. Like Señor Moose, the Swingside’s servings are generous enough for two meals, which makes us happy.
The Poor Taste Ten
By Joe Mabel
1. Eggs, toast, links, hash browns, and a Bloody Mary at The 5 Point Café. From a taxidermied moose head spangled with dusty bras to a sticker that reads “Drink your beer, there’s sober people in China,” the Five Point is not to be missed.
2. A slice and Caesar side salad at Veraci. Best pizza in the city.
3. A German sausage dog and a beer at Shorty’s. Do not let the clown paraphernalia and bike messengers deter you — Shorty’s is a quality establishment. If you’re feeling classy, creep into the back lounge, sit in a crazy swivel “bar stool” the size of a captain’s chair, and order a fancy cocktail. You will not be disappointed.
4. Pho at Pho Bac on Jackson. Seattle is a Pho city and every restaurant has its adherents, but we like Pho Bac for its delicate broth and weird décor (driftwood, fake plants, and Christmas lights).
5. Chicken sandwich and tater tots at The Tin Hat. The Tin Hat in Ballard has upped the ante in the past couple of years. Their chicken sandwiches are crunchy and succulent, and the spicy tots are addictive like crack. When ordering a drink, know that the orange and grapefruit juices are fresh-squeezed.
6. Onion rings, sliders, and lager at The Jolly Roger Tap Room. The smoky onion rings at The Jolly Roger are the best onion rings in the world, hands down. Jolly Roger sliders feature perfectly soft rolls and a selection of unusual and amazing hot sauces. Plus the staff is nice and the overall atmosphere is friendly and unpretentious.
7. Piroshky at Piroshky Piroshky on Pike Street. Savory and delightful Russian pastries filled with meat, cheese, and vegetables. Need I say more?
8. Carne asada at Señor Moose. Really, anything at Señor Moose.
9. Spaetzle at The People’s Pub. This buttery German noodle dish is the perfect thing for a rainy Seattle evening. The vesper plate is also generous and delightful.
10. Bahn Mi at Saigon Deli. Just go.
